Encountering Loss Aside from Death
Our specialists in counseling in Orlando know that grief and loss are difficult to understand. But a loss doesn't always indicate death. Occasionally there's a hole in your life, or something you adore is suddenly gone, yet no one has perished. You've not attended any funerals. No one has delivered a casserole. But something remains different. There's been a noticeable shift; you must uncover a way to endure it and adapt to it. It hurts, and you may move back and forth between feeling sad, angry, backstabbed, and sometimes even cheerful emotions like comfort or excitement in some situations.
Consider these instances:
- After getting a divorce, a man not only relinquishes his wife but moves out of the house he had selected and now sees his children only half the time. Also, he no longer communicates with some of the couples he spent time with and usually changes churches to avoid uncomfortable encounters.
- A non-tenured university professor is laid off because of lower funding available in the budget for the division. She starts a national pursuit for new employment, realizing she'll have to move from the home and city she loves to find another well-paying position in her specialization. Her teen kids get furious at the thought of having to move out of state. This loss and suffering will be clear in the process of moving forward.
- A family finds that the youngest offspring in their household is autistic. Their time is unexpectedly spent reading reports and discovering terms like Early Intervention, Applied Behavior Analysis, and Individualized Education Plans. The parents recognize that their child's future will probably be much different than anticipated. They will likely need more help to reach many milestones they've been looking forward to encountering. They mourn the loss of the future they envisioned for their child.
- A young lady has always been close to her sibling, but her sister recently married and moved out of state. They speak on the phone, but it simply isn't the same. They are in different stages of life now, and her sister appears too busy. When they speak, her sister's life is full of concerns about her house, and she is preparing to have a baby. It appears they don't connect like they once did. She needs to mourn the loss of the previous relationship to adjust to the new one.
- A university senior realizes he wasn't admitted to any law schools he applied to. He's expended the last four years toiling toward law school and isn't sure what to do next. This is a defeat, and he mourns the failure of his planned future.
- A young woman's best friend moves out of the country with her family to accomplish mission work. It's almost Summer now, and the young ladies spent the last three Summers together swimming, playing outside, and devising new games. This summer, there will be a gap, a loss, and she will mourn her friend's absence.
Recognize that loss comes in many forms
Employing the word loss to talk about these occasions is alright. Loss can be complex, confusing, and full of conflicting emotions regardless of your kind of loss. These feelings are painful at times. It's easy to invalidate yourself by claiming, "It really could be worse," or disregarding the grief completely. Nevertheless, always pushing the discomfort away will force it to return repeatedly until you mark the occasion as a loss and advance through the sorrow.